The Rachel Zoe Project Recap: ‘A Sister for Sky?’ (Season 5, Episode 7)

“I think Rodg is a full B-cup.”
Photo: Bravo, © NBC Universal, Inc.

Previously on The Rachel Zoe Project: Rachel gets majorly two-dimensional (a billboard). Would you like some whine with that cheesy cardigan? And the Joc-key to her heart is through her shoes. Sweet, now we are all caught up!

The episode opens at RZ’s home and she is hanging with her hair stylist/Bestie Joey Maalouf. He is the Marcie to her Peppermint Patty. Joey starts in on RZ about having a second child. RZ is hesitant because she is already so busy and has such a good thing going with Skyscraper. I understand how she feels because I’ve considered getting a third TV, but I am just so busy with the two I already have! Joey also likes to point out that RZ isn’t dressed like a typical mom and she even wore 6-inch heels to and from the hospital when she gave birth to Sky Box. But that makes sense because RZ thinks about shoes more often than Jared thinks about Subway.

At the office, the Pink Ladies (RZ’s employees/fashion disciples) have a laugh about yogurt and then it is on to…drum roll please…PURSES! A Terry Gross look-alike is the leader of the “Handbag Team.” RZ proceeds to rain on the purse parade by saying all the things she wants to change about the prototypes. Terry Gross seems like she is going to lose her sh*t. RZ shows her O-face over some fabrics until Rodg comes in and casually says that he doesn’t know where Skynet is. But we know he is with Rodg’s Dad, so no worries, but RZ still finds the strength to rub his irresponsibility in his face and make fun of him to Team Handbag. Oh men! Can’t live with ‘em, can’t trade ‘em in for some Gucci.

RZ and Joey take Rodg for a fashion makeover at Allsaints where Rodg lives out every straight man’s dream of being a Ken doll for his wife to dress up! Am I right fellas? But Rodg does seem pleased that RZ is giving him the time of day because he always feels neglected (Wah-Wah). RZ calls Rodg out for having “man boobs” which only seems to turn him on and he starts to get flirty, implying they should make another baby. Maybe he could breast feed?

Back at the office RZ gets a new assignment to do a bohemian fashion shoot (a style that she practically invented). MAJ! Then Rodg meets his white friend William (a vintage clothing dealer) for a lunchy-lunch. Rodg fills him in on the progress of the hair salon and they chit chat about the clothes that William has brought from Europe. RZ flips out over some old sparkly jackets and Skylander makes a cutie cameo. A 60’s Lagerfeld dress brings RZ to tears.

Then it’s back to NYC and RZ goes on Good Morning America to promote her salon DreamDry (it’s like a wet dream, but the opposite). The salon is having it’s big opening and it’s going to be MAJ! DreamDry looks as chic as most things on Bravo. They make a toast to the gorgeous Jonathan Adler wannabe floor and then it’s back to LA.

Now it’s time for fashion and boho chic. It’s crazy foggy and RZ was counting on blue skies for her sunny-hippie shoot. RZ admits she can’t make the clouds disappear even though she is a fashion god. She gets her bangs trimmed by the hair stylist for the shoot. The only thing more high maintenance than Rodg in RZ’s life are these damn bangs! Finally the sky clears and its time for CLOTHES! MAJ! SICK! DIE! AHHH-MAZING! All we are missing is burst graphics shooting across the screen like in the Adam West version of Batman. BOOM! CHIC! POW! HATS! RZ reminds us that she and Rodg are dead heads (which is not surprising since most Jewish stoners are). Hence she loves the hippie look.

Finally we are back at home with RZ and Sky Zone for a little quality time. Noodles and ‘Wheels on the Bus,’ too cute! RZ and Rodg contemplate another baby, but for now, Sky’s the limit.

Will RZ’s salon be a MAJ success? Will the Handbag Team beat Valley and make it to regionals this year? Will Rodg ever make a black friend? Tune in next week to find out!

Randi Lawson

Randi Lawson is a Philadelphia based graphic designer and comedy enthusiast. Currently an art director at a housewares company, Randi creates funny tees, games, barware and other cool goods. Her products have been featured in movies, television and can be found in stores like Spencer’s and Urban Outfitters. When she isn’t designing, watching tv or listening to podcasts, Randi is on twitter cracking jokes about pop culture. Website.